This is a parody version of When You Say Nothing At All, by Ronan Keating. The lyrics have been rewritten to pay tribute to our famously useless, constantly grinning and slightly malevolent leader, Jacinda Ardern. New lyrics and performance by Anto Coates.

Lyrics…

Verse 1:

It’s amazing that Kiwis still vote for Ardern,
After four years of hell, you’d think they would learn,
She talks a good game, but soon you will find,
A facade with nothing behind.

Chorus:

The smile on her face makes you think she’s not too bad,
But she’s just thinking ‘bout throwing you in the Gulag,
While we’re all captive and suffering, she’s having a ball…
She’ll promise freedom — but then does nothing at all.

Verse 2:

We’re a team of five million, so says Madam Muck,
But if you’re an ex-pat, you’re sh*t out of luck,
Tune in at 1 for some indoctrination,
Roll on up for your twelfth vaccination!

Chorus:

That smile on her face says that she’ll never leave ya,
But she’ll soon bugger off for a job in Geneva, She’s Jacindarella at midnight, departing the ball…At least she left a shoe… she left us nothing at all.

(Musical interlude)
Go out for dinner, you now need a permit,
Don’t want the jab? You’ll soon be a hermit,
Freedom is now just a memory, we barely recall,
We backed the wrong horse — she’s good for nothing at all.

(Repeat and fade… backing vocals “backed the wrong horse she’s good for nothing at all…”)

That smile on her face, half-truths and the lies, her fidgety hands let you know she’s misleading…

I'm a girl Friday who schedules posts. I'm in my early twenties and I voted for ACT at the last election.