Ardern and Robertson are running a circus. I leave it to you to work out who is the ringmaster and who is the clown. Ardern warned beforehand to prepare for pain. She, of course, didn’t divulge just how much. As it turned out, for obvious reasons. If I’d known how much, eg. a $124 billion rise in public debt that equates to $70,000 per household, I would probably have anaesthetised myself and spent the afternoon in another probably better place. Robertson said it was time to put the brolly up as the rainy day had arrived. He then proceeded to read out a statement which was more like having thunder and lightning of biblical proportions rained upon us. Noah and the Ark sprang to mind.

The Government deserves some credit for extending the wage subsidy but not much else. This was a budget Robertson could have produced in normal times without COVID-19. What he’s done is use the event to spray money around, again poorly targeted, which does little to help those who need it most: small to medium businesses and the decimated tourist industry. Proof, yet again, that this Government has no understanding of the requirements of running a business. The nearest is Damien O’Connor who owns a dairy farm.

Getting retail up and running should have been a priority. Apart from continuing the wage subsidy they got precious little else. Outside farming and tourism we are largely a nation of small to medium retailers, be it in malls, high street shops, restaurants, cafes, bars, car dealers or light industrial. Right now these people need short term, non-refundable financial aid to help with the overheads which didn’t stop when the customers did. The trade training scheme is commendable for job creation but of no immediate help.

Tourism got a measly $4 million though we are told there is more to come in the coming months. Why not now when it’s desperately needed? It probably doesn’t help that the Tourism Minister is a basket case. He turned up at the Epidemic Response Committee and couldn’t define what tourism was. This is the country’s top earning industry and its on its knees. It is reported job losses could still be 100,000 plus. Where was the talk of a multi million dollar spend on domestic tourism which would help travel, transport, hospitality and accommodation operators? Nonexistent. Why? Social distancing no doubt. Two on a bus and four on a train doesn’t cut it. As for accomodation, there were six in the bed and Jacinda said roll over, roll over and Grant fell out followed by Kelvin, Phil, Willie, and Megan.

So who were the big winners? Surprise, surprise, it was NZ First and the Greens. In other words, a normal budget. Winston’s baubles this time around were big boys toys in the form of trains and boats and he probably would have got planes as well had they been in business. Actually he did get the planes through the Defence allocation.

Does anyone remember the Dionne Warwick song? This to me was the ghost of Rob Muldoon. Did you hear a chuckle from up above by any chance? There will be 11,000 ‘green’ jobs — whatever they are. Regional environment schemes, biosecurity, pest control (does that include the Government) and DOC’s “jobs for nature” fund. Pretty much as wishy-washy as the Greens themselves.

Welfare featured prominently as you would expect. More parents won’t have to provide a lunch as another $220 million has been poured into the free lunch programme feeding another 200,000 children. You would expect a reduction in the school rolls, though, as a percentage of pupils must have died of starvation since the schools have been closed. As David Seymour said, these kids will learn the hard way there is no such thing as a free lunch as they will grow up living with triple the debt we had a year ago. Eight thousand new state homes will be built over five years. Really? They’ll need more than Bob the Builder and Peter, Paul and Mary’s Little Boxes to achieve that on their current track record.

The big things that would have made a difference just weren’t there. David Seymour pointed out legislation was needed to fix the RMA Act, to cut red tape, to provide for the next epidemic with sorting out the borders, ensuring we have the necessary gear. Where were the vitally needed tax cuts? Where was there any sign of enthusiasm for attracting vitally needed overseas investment? Not interested. This was a predictable budget all about Big Government run from the Beehive. This is their preferred approach, the socialist way. The Government runs everything, uses our money and borrows more to pay for everything with no idea what to do when the money runs out.

In terms of a long term plan there wasn’t one, which bore out what Rob Fyfe has been saying. There is no vision. Just a hope of keeping as many jobs as possible but no strategy to create any new ones in the immediate future. Obviously Robertson has kept a war chest of billions for the election. When the country is in the situation it is, this is no more than a disgraceful cynical political ploy. As was the budget actually. Keep the coalition partners happy and to hell with everyone else.

It is only too obvious that the people who have the ability to get us out of these types of situations are all on the other side of the house. Think of the GFC, earthquakes etc. Arguing over the pros and cons of them is pointless. They are needed. With this lot, as Carole King would say, It Might As Well Rain Until September.

I predict it will and there’ll be a stormy few months between now and then.

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A right-wing crusader. Reached an age that embodies the dictum only the good die young. Country music buff. Ardent Anglophile. Hates hypocrisy and by association left-wing politics.