A little while back, President Trump got the leftards free-trade organic cotton knickers in a twist by suggesting that there were a few countries outside the good ole U S of A that he felt were nothing better than ‘shitholes‘.

People jumped up and down and said that, aside from being extremely orange, Trump was also an awful person for likening said countries to long drops, even though he was entirely correct.

Now long drops in New Zealand are part of our cultural heritage. Every real Kiwi should have used one at least once in their lives; if you haven’t, you should get out camping at a DoC site, but turning your whole city into one probably wasn’t what they had in mind when the Portland Oregon city fathers started their homeless hugging.

‘Portland: Don’t worry, we’ll pick up after you.’

How sad those lefty losers must now be feeling after hearing the news that their very own bastion of all things weird, Sanctuary City Portland seems to have now taken on the mantle of America’s Biggest Dunghole.

Portland Police Say They’re Not Allowed to Stop People From Pooping in the Street

Portland has a serious poop problem. The Oregon city recently acknowledged that it removed over 12,500 litres of human waste from the streets in the past year alone. 

However, the police say they’re powerless to stop homeless people from relieving themselves in public, even if it happens right in front of them.

According to a recent analysis by the city, as many as 450 reports of human waste are filed with Portland’s homeless complaint system every week. Each time a crew responds, it costs taxpayers $500.

That’s $225,000 per week, just to clean up after the homeless that they have encouraged to come and defecate in their fair city!

I guess that puts a whole new spin on ‘Get Woke, Go Broke’. Maybe we could change that to ‘Get Woke, End up With a City Covered in Kaka’.

Portland City Officials? Just gotta love street poop.

But Portland is not only the US capital of Excrement, it is also in Oregon state where recently, soccer fans booed at their new military enlistees while they were saying their Oath of Allegiance during a half-time ceremony.

And it is also the State where they have banned spectators from flying their own country’s Stars and Stripes flag from stadiums but have upheld the right of pseudo-terrorist group Antifa to fly their own flag!

Quite why anyone would choose to visit, let alone live there, is beyond me.

Back in 2014, some Portland folk tried to change their city slogan away from ‘The City That Works’. I can see why. That would have to be one of the most pathetic taglines ever, and probably why most Portlandonians prefer to use ‘Keep Portland Weird’.

Unfortunately, the best they could come up with was: “Portland: Drink well, eat local, shop tax free!” Good grief, I guess they are deliberately trying to make the place sound boring to make decent people stay away so there is more room for tent cities.

‘Portland: Still better than San Francisco’

Still, that slogan only came into force after they were finished with their short term Cinco De Mayo week slogan of ‘Portland, Vancouver’s Tijuana’!

But really, they need help. I think we here at The BFD, being the civic minded people that we are, should help out with a new slogan for them so please feel free to add your suggestions to the comments below. I’ll start;

‘Portland, You’re Never More Than 6 Feet From A Toilet’


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ExPFC, ex lots of things. I'm a passionate user of fossil fuels, a proud flag flying Kiwi, I have trouble suffering fools and the permanently offended. Sometimes I may play the devil's advocate, sometimes I may actually mean what I write, it will be up to you to figure out which is which. Don't take me too seriously, and don't complain if you do. Politics wise, I have previously given my party vote to National, and I think once to Act. To my eternal shame, I even once voted for Helen. Sorry for that, it was at a time when I was only thinking of myself, it won't happen again. I am currently undecided.