Perhaps it’s because I’m used to Question Time in the Australian parliament, but lor’, you Kiwis sound a bit soft. Is “part-time prime minister” really the worst insult ever used in the Beehive? Or do New Zealand’s media just need to get out more?
National leader Simon Bridges this week calling Jacinda Ardern a “part-time prime minister” seemed to represent a new weirdly nasty tone entering New Zealand politics.
Kiwi maiden aunts clutching at their pearls over what would, in the Australian parliament, barely even qualify as friendly banter might well be advised to take a teaspoon of the proverbial cement.
With a warning for those of a delicate New Zealand persuasion, consider some of these gems from the Australian parliament:
“You scumbags.” “The Opposition could not manage a tart shop.” “You boxhead you wouldn’t know. You are flat out counting past 10.” “Mangy maggot”. “You are simply a shiver looking for a spine to run up.”
And that was just Paul Keating. Mark Latham was even more notorious for his blunt interjections. He called PM John Howard, “an arse-licker,” who “went over there, kissed some bums, and got patted on the head”. Perhaps his most famous insult was calling the Coalition “a conga line of suckholes”.
Australian politicians have even channeled Monty Python, retorting across the chamber, “I fart in your general direction!”
Even the supposedly polite Brits have livened up Question Time with such bon mots as “cagmags”, “sex-starved boa-constrictor” and “semi-house-trained polecat”. If you doubt the rowdiness of the British parliament, watch compilations like this.
Even more hilarious from the maiden aunts in the NZ media-left is this sniffle:
But that particular comment seemed personal, with no basis in truth. It’s not like there has been any stories in the media of her wagging work, or calling in sick all the time.
Not in the media, no: because the legacy media groupthink doesn’t dare allow a harsh word about Jacinda Ardern. Others are less sanguine. Perhaps the legacy media and their luvvie hangers-on should wrench themselves away from talking to each other on their Twitter feeds and listen to what people outside their bubble are saying.
Of course, no left-elite whine is complete without playing the inevitable “misojuhnee!” card.
Finance Minister Grant Robertson took him to task and wondered if it had a sexist overtone. Bridges rubbished this, but ask yourself. Could you imagine that charge ever being levelled at a male prime minister? Even, the most useless one.
Well absolutely, yes. Bill Shorten slated the entire Coalition as “a part-time parliament”.
But no bow is too long to draw, for a huffy actor-posing-as-journalist desperate to find imaginary sexism everywhere.
When Helen Clark was the PM, mention of her running a Nanny state seemed a subtle dig at the fact that was a woman and didn’t have children.
Here’s some advice: either leave the political opinionating up to people who know what they’re talking about, or read a dictionary. “Nanny state” is a long-standing term in politics, which dates back to at least 1901 in France. It was used in Britain from at least the middle 60s, where it was used in The Spectator to describe the government of Harold Wilson (a cis-gender male, in case you didn’t know). Perhaps if our pearl-clutching actor had bothered to open the dictionary, he would have found it described in plain English: “a government that tries to give too much advice or make too many laws about how people should live their lives, especially about eating, smoking, or drinking alcohol”.
Then comes this stunning admission:
I don’t know what prime ministers do all day.
Then perhaps you might want to find out, before gracing us with your uninformed political wisdom. Or just stick to acting.
I can’t help but wonder if this isn’t part of a new Aussie-inspired approach.
stuff.co.nz/national/politics/114731437/was-nasty-parttime-pm-slur-a-hint-bridges-is-adopting-aussie-smear-tactics
If it is, you New Zealanders have got a long way to go and a lot of hardening up to do, before you can kick heads with us bad boys across the Tasman.
Oh, and by the way: if you’re going to put yourself in print calling other people “dicks”, and “dodgy”, then you might want to hold off the pearl-clutching self-righteousness and get your own house in order.
After all, you’re sounding a bit “nasty” there, sunshine.