Some years ago, the British comic Viz ran a story: “Poor people ruining the planet for celebrities”. The story focused on how celebrities couldn’t fly their private jets or gaze from the windows of their country estates without seeing disgusting ordinary people in the far distance.

Once again, reality is beating satire.

Chris Hemsworth has voiced his opposition to a resort and tourism development at Seven Mile Beach, a long stretch of coastline in the Byron Bay area.

Byron Bay is the destination for rich people wanting to pretend that they’re laid-back country folk. Especially celebrities. The median house price in the town is more than $2 million. It’s where your Paul Hogans, Simon Bakers, Olivia Newton-Johns, and Naomi Wattses go to swan past hippy shops and go on “wellness retreats”.

Unfortunately for the World’s Most Fabulous People, it’s also a popular tourist destination.

The 37-year-old actor, who lives in a $30million mansion in Broken Head, 10km from Byron Bay, has thrown his support behind traditional custodians who want to stop the development because the land is sacred to Indigenous people.

Byron Bay is one of the least Aboriginal places in Australia. Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islanders make up just 1.6% of the population, less than half the Australian average.

Still, having a few pet Abos around comes in handy, when you’re a sleb who doesn’t want common people spoiling your beach.

‘I stand shoulder to shoulder, in solidarity with Aunty Lois Cook in opposition to the tourism development at Seven Mile Beach,’ Chris said in a video shared with his 48.6 million Instagram followers, tagging the Friends of Seven Mile account.

‘I fully support traditional custodians to be able to comfortably tell their people’s stories, to preserve and protect their homelands,’ he added.

Yeah, yeah, sure. Whatever it takes to keep the hoi polloi out of your beachside Hameau de la Reine.

Hemsworth is said to be ‘wary’ of the recent influx of Sydneysiders to Byron Bay, the coastal town he and his family have called home for seven years.

He expressed disapproval of city types flocking to the tourist hotspot during the Covid-19 pandemic, in February’s edition of Men’s Health Australia.

Because, y’know, he’s practically a born’n’bred local.

Chris relocated to Byron with his wife, Spanish actress Elsa Pataky, and their children, daughter India Rose, eight, and twin sons Sasha and Tristan, six, in 2014.

Daily Mail

Presumably, zoning laws prohibit three-metre fences and packs of attack-dogs. Typical.

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Punk rock philosopher. Liberalist contrarian. Grumpy old bastard. I grew up in a generational-Labor-voting family. I kept the faith long after the political left had abandoned it. In the last decade...