I’ve put together a Bingo card in order to alleviate the tedious nature of the daily propaganda from the Podium of Truth.

Wibble has put together every single one of the terms in a single statement:

“Kia Ora Koutou to my team of 5 million, thanks for joining us from all across the motu to listen to my elimination strategy for beating this very very tricky virus. 

As you know we need to unite against covid if we are going to baddle the virus and make sure that we don’t all get killed by the deadly delta.  If you aren’t in MIQ then you should all stay at home in isolation and not be jepradizing yourselves or your rangitahi during this pandemic. 

If you do (and if you do, and if you doooo) have to go out into the communidy then remember to be kind, wear a mask, full PPE and maintain social distancing.

We are using our modelling to build a picture of this vicious virus so that we will know when we have reached the peak. 

If you haven’t already booked for the vaccine remember that the vaccine is safe, although that won’t really madder for the majoriddy of you that haven’t had it yet because we have run out anyway, sorry let me clarify that, what I mean is that we have plenty but we just need to reduce the demand for it to make sure that the supply is not exceeded by the demand, and this will require elongading the timeline to sometime in the future.” 

As much at home writing editorials as being the subject of them, Cam has won awards, including the Canon Media Award for his work on the Len Brown/Bevan Chuang story. When he’s not creating the news,...