CNN Correspondent: The FBI has released a photograph of the suspected pipe bong insurrectionist. He/she/it who was was part of the rabble led by Donald Trump, who, wearing horns, dressed in animal skins and armed with a lethal flag, stormed the capital.
The suspect was captured on a surveillance video; originally wearing a purple trouser suit and carrying a large Gucci bag near the Capitol.
The agency announced they were now offering $75,000 to anyone who recognises the suspect.
A statement from the FBI said that Trump is to be charged with staging the most feeble insurrection ever in the history of the world. It was a disgrace and embarrassment to the US, he said.
Previous US Presidents have been staging successful insurrections with ease right throughout the world.
Where were the tanks? The high powered weaponry?
Instead all we got was a motley collection of backwoodsmen, most barehanded, a few with flags, who, after forcing themselves inside, just packed up and left after milling around aimlessly for a few hours. It is a testament of how the US has deteriorated under Trump.
According to White House sources, the Prime Minister Jacinda Ardern was first in line to congratulate Joe Biden after his inauguration.
In their TikTok discussion he said he fondly remembered playing rugby at college in the late 1800s and commended her on making her national rugby team all black and quipping, “if they don’t vote for you they aint black.”
He said he looked forward to smelling her in person.
He also asked her to pass on his best wishes to her husband Justin Trudeau.
As regards trade, a new agreement would be dependent on New Zealand buying voting machines to ensure it was following best progressive practice and in step with the Great Reset.
New Zealand was great place to raise sheep, he said.
In the latest banning frenzy, McDonalds, after permanently banning Donald Trump, supersized him and banned all his supporters. No Big Macs for yous, they said.
Covid 19 News: After the recent covid border leak, beauty parlour owners are extremely worried that the feared Brazilian covid variant may get into Aotearoa.
Their national spokesperson called on the Prime Minister, Jacinda Ardern, to have large amounts of compensation ready if the variant leaks through the border and assiduously infects the population.
The first Brazilian symptom, all pubic hair permanently falling out, would be ruinous to most beauty parlour owners, the spokesperson said. Along with the hair, three-quarters of their income would vanish.
News release. The Greens spokesperson Marama Davidson has called for all petrol-powered cars to be removed from the roads and repurposed as emergency housing.
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