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Satire

“GOOD MORNING AMERICA, DON’T YOU KNOW I’M YOUR NATIVE SON?”

Don’tcha feel like you have been through this all before?  Only last time most of the pundits didn’t think that Trump would win. The Networks won’t call it, and Trump thinks it’s a fraud on the people who have voted. PAGANI said she would eat a grub on TV if Biden won. She must be confidently in the Trump camp.

The CARS did not turn out for Biden, they were supposed to show up at a car-park in Delaware while the election was going on. Arizona went to him though. Pennsylvania with a quarter of votes being mailed in has still to be counted. This could be three more days. Votes have to be post-marked November 3rd. Biden’s nose is ahead at the moment in Swing states.

Why didn’t I think of that? “Quarantine Camps.” Trust FOXY LOXY (Laura Ingraham) to come up with it.
At least they know what I am up against Downunder.
I’ve called AGAIN for testing for arrivals before they board the plane overseas to come here after the latest outbreaks at the Sudima hotel in CHRISTCHURCH.

YOU KNOW WHAT!
WE FINALLY WON SOMETHING  OVER THE GREENS, apart from the RED QUEEN practically ditching them.

CANNABIS CHLOE (Swarbrick) came a cropper. Like JOHN (Key) with his flag referendum. SS on NATION (Simon Shepherd) seemed to be enjoying the moment a tad too much when he asked her why she thought the cannabis legalization referendum had not passed.
EMMERSON’S Cartoon in the HOS showed a cannabis spliff failing to launch.

My “prayin’ in the chapel” did work!

That varmint at the FERALD (Herald) has me conversing with my doll Honey Chile and misnaming my husband by calling him Talofa Wong Tung. I should try that and see what happens.

WHAT WE HAVE NO TOMATOES!
Even though Auckland Council paid the chief executive of Watercare an $815,000 salary my tomato growers for the local Clevedon Market have gone dry and will have to put a bore down.

The GREEN-EYED gang thought The RED QUEEN might need them to rule. It wasn’t to be. Besides being attractive, intelligent and young CANNABIS CHLOE could be competition along the way!

GG (Galloping Garner) said he would go vegan if LABOUR got enough votes to rule alone and they did. (Watch the weight fall off) Who writes his script? Quite good! He said the American election is a “battle of the old white guys”.

It was “LIVE AND LET DIE” for 007 in the Bahamas. RIP. The Original BOND [shaken not stirred] SEAN CONNERY the greatest living Scotsman met “M” in “Skyfall” on Hallow’een. He was the son of truck driver Joe and laundress mother Euphamia of Edinburgh. He never got on with Ian Fleming author of the Bond novels who called him a “stuntman.” He got the first Bond film “Dr.NO” without a screen test.
He was voted by PEOPLE magazine in 1999 as the sexiest man of the century.

By the bye Pope Gregory 1V instituted All Hallows’ Day (All Saints Day) on the 1st of November. A vigil is held on Hallow’een the night before for Anglicans and Catholics.
This might account for the more ghoulish aspect of Hallow’een or perhaps “Twilight Payment” winning the Melbourne Cup or possibly Twyford being demoted.

“DOCTOR NO” has taken over in the UK with a lockdown for a month, possibly including Christmas. The Scousers (Liverpool)  are to be the first guineas pigs to be tested by the army.

This has been the biggest voter turnout in the history of the American elections.
Did you see Biden had to enlist the help of LADY GAGA. I am not going to say the obvious. Okay, I will. Who is the most GAGA here?

Ron MacClousky puts it well in the “BALLAD of DONALD.”

Some don’t LIKE him, some think he’s HIP.
But all agree he gives a lot of LIP,  BIG DON.
It’s no secret where the money came from,
He appeared on the scene with a mighty SUM
He doesn’t smoke never had a drink.
Make America great who cares if you’re a NUT?
He came out a winner, people LOVE this guy,
Rolls on like a tank, tries to play FAIR
He’s got swagger and juice, NOW,
If he would just do something with that frigin HAIR,
BIG DON, BIG DON, BIG BAD DON.

I think we will end with a BOND title “NEVER SAY NEVER AGAIN”.
It hasn’t been a Biden landslide as the polls predicted.

Here’s lookin at ya Don,
It’s going to be Guy Fawkes fireworks,

Make mine a double Judy,
Down the hatch,

Punching Judy.

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Never voted Labour, Greens, Act or Maori Party. Spent time overseas, mainly in the U.K. Come Judgement Day, want to say I did “something” rather than “nothing”. Love Trump. Love old movies.